Devotionals

Do you need a do-over?

Do you need a do-over?
Hanukkah holds so many lessons for us, if you have never celebrated it as a Christian, you will find great life lessons in everything about the celebration.
 
 One of the most important lessons is how to open your eyes to see that you have allowed things in that shouldn’t be there. We learn how to rekindle the lights, so we see into the dark, cobwebbed corners that have been defiled by those things we slowly allowed to creep in. Then we do a big sweep and rededicate ourselves to listen to the counsel of our good Father and start walking out our purpose again!
 
Hanukkah comes from the Hebrew word Chanak which means dedication. It is a picture of being dedicated for a purpose. The purpose of the temple that they rededicated was a place to worship God!  Your purpose as the current temple of the Holy Spirit is to do the same.  You need to know your purpose if you are going to be dedicated to it!
 
In Acts 13:36, and Luke 7:30 the word used for purpose is the same word for counsel, (boule—boolay). The idea here is, if you listen to counsel, you will know your purpose! In Acts, we learn that when David had fulfilled God’s counsel (his purpose) he rested. But in Luke we learn that the Pharisees rejected God’s counsel by not getting baptized, and so they rejected their purpose.
 
When we listen to God’s counsel, He has pre-ordained and instructed us to walk in good works which he set up ahead of time for us. These good works fit right into the wheelhouse of the gifts and skills He gave us. (Romans 8:28, Ephesians 2:10). Following through on these good works shows us our purpose.
 
Go light yourself up with the oil of His presence, investigate the corners of your heart and mind to find the things that have creeped in that weren’t supposed to be there, do a thorough clean out, and rededicate your heart to be used for His purpose alone! The promise of Hanukkah is that no matter how dark it’s been, there is always enough of the oil of His presence to relight your lamp.

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I thought I was a horrible person...

 
Everything made me so angry inside and I couldn’t stop the screaming rages. I could hear myself say, “Just STOP!” in the middle of a fit, but I was helpless to shut my mouth. I felt like I was watching a different person react, but it was me! After a day of raging I would lay in bed hearing, “You should just shoot yourself, you’re ruining your children,” over and over in my head.

My children were afraid of me, one was cutting, one kept running away. I knew it was my fault, but I couldn’t seem to admit it. I couldn’t handle anymore guilt.


Everything seemed to cause stress, nothing was peaceful, the smallest thing would send me to my room to hide. The asthma I had since I was a little girl, that was so horrible I felt like my lungs were going to explode, was magnified by the stress and rages.

When I knew it couldn’t handle any more, it got worse. I started having miscarriages, I became allergic to everything, I was always wheezing, I had constant headaches, and all I had the energy to do was sleep.

I was sure my situation just needed more prayer, so I prayed and prayed, went to counseling, went through deliverance, but I only ended up feeling even more guilt, because I wasn’t getting better.
Then one day I began to see a connection…. when I’d eat or smell certain things I would lose control afterwards. I noticed a pattern between stressful situations and being too tired to leave my bed. I finally saw that I had been living with severe adrenal fatigue for most of my motherhood. I also realized that I had been deeply wounded by things in my childhood that I didn't even remember clearly.
It was a journey of trial and error, learning exactly what had been poisoning my body and mind every day, but gradually I discovered tools and strategies that helped me make huge strides in calming the drama in my home and heart. I learned to overcome the wounds and trauma, I learned to shut down the lies.
As my adrenals healed and my heart healed from past trauma, the suicide, depression, and asthma disappeared, and energy came back. I didn’t feel trapped inside a rampaging maniac, I felt peaceful for the first time!

I wake up now content about the day to come. I’m not worried that I’ll ruin someone’s life today! In fact, I spend my days helping others find freedom, healing, and JOY!

You are not alone, and you don’t have to feel trapped by your past, by lies you've believed, or even by physical issues like adrenal fatigue! There is a simple path to peace. If you are ready to begin, contact me!
 

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